May 2013
that-stupid-tardis-sound:
one time i got bored in class so i drank 3 bottles of water and when my teacher asked me what i was doing i told him i was trying to drown myself
if album titles were honest
take this to your grave: i fucking fucking hate you so fucking much and i hate myself twice as fucking much
from under the cork tree: i really wanna have sex with you but i also wanna kill myself
infinity on high: i dont really wanna do this anymore (you and the suicidal thoughts)
folie a deux: life is good and i hope it stays that way
believers never die: bye bitches
teruteruhanamura:
im fucking cryiNG OH MY GOD???? THIS GUY FROM SHREK
IS CALLED LORD FARQUAAD RIGHT??? AND FARQUAAD SOUNDS A LOT LIKE FUCKWAD WHEN U SAY IT
LORD FUCKWAD
HOW DID THAT ONE SLIP PAST
fakehighschoolboyfriend:
a musical entitled “may, senior year” filled with hits such as:
“i never knew you wanted to join the military”
“why are you getting married”
“that’s an awful tattoo”
“what am i doing for the rest of my life”
“how will i afford deodorant in college”
“why can’t i graduate already”
“why can’t i graduate already (reprise): why am i graduating already”
littlemsbetty:
deerstalkingjawn:
australiansanta:
thesociallyawkwardasian:
queerlava:
thesociallyawkwardasian:
how do mermaids have babies
do you think the people who play teletubbies feel horny on set sometimes
why didn’t tarzan have a beard
how many things are there
How do ducks masturbate
The night blogging is strong with these ones.
whorville:
I have bullshitted my way through almost two decades of life
50 Questions You've Never Been Asked
1. What's your favorite candle scent?
2. What female celebrity do you wish was your sister?
3. What male celebrity do you wish was your brother?
4. How old do you think you'll be when you get married?
5. Do you know a hoarder?
6. Can you do a split?
7. How old were you when you learned how to ride a bike?
8. How many oceans have you swam in?
9. How many countries have you been to?
10. Is anyone in your family in the army?
11. What would you name your daughter if you had one?
12. What would you name your son if you had one?
13. What's the worst grade you got on a test?
14. What was your favorite TV show when you were a child?
15. What did you dress up as on Halloween when you were eight?
16. Have you read any of the Harry Potter, Hunger Games or Twilight series?
17. Would you rather have an American accent or a British accent?
18. Did your mother go to college?
19. Are your grandparents still married?
20. Have you ever taken karate lessons?
21. Do you know who Kermit the frog is?
22. What's the first amusement park you've been to?
23. What language, besides your native language, would you like to be fluent in?
24. Do you spell the color as grey or gray?
25. Is your father bald?
26. Do you know triplets?
27. Do you prefer Titanic or The Notebook?
28. Have you ever had Indian food?
29. What's the name of your favorite restaurant?
30. Have you ever been to Olive Garden?
31. Do you belong to any warehouse stores (Costco, BJ's, etc.)?
32. What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender?
33. If you have a nickname, what is it?
34. Who's your favorite person in the world?
35. Would you rather live in a rural area or in the suburbs?
36. Can you whistle?
37. Do you sleep with a nightlight?
38. Do you eat breakfast every morning?
39. Do you take any pills or medication daily?
40. What medical conditions do you have?
41. How many times have you been to the hospital?
42. Have you ever seen Finding Nemo?
43. Where do you buy your jeans?
44. What's the last compliment you got?
45. Do you usually remember your dreams in the morning?
46. What flavor tea do you enjoy?
47. How many pairs of shoes do you currently own?
48. What religion will you raise your children to practice?
49. How old were you when you found out that Santa wasn't real?
50. Why do you have a tumblr?
alyssa-lenore:
stuff you ask your mom:
mom where’s my towel
mom what do we eat for dinner
mom what time is it
mom where’s my phone
mom when do you come back
mom what day is it
stuff you ask your dad
dad where is mom
[AGGRESSIVELY CARES FOR YOU FROM A DISTANCE BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW HOW TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER]
PLEASE OH MY GOD THIS IS SO COOL
•TAKE A PICTURE OF
1.What you're drinking.
2.Your mobile phone.
3.Television remote.
4.Your hands.
5.Your lips.
6.Your favorite possession.
7.Your favorite stuffed animal/toy.
8.Your face right now.
9.The shirt you're wearing.
10.What you're eating.
11.Your room.
12.Your T.V.
13.Something random.
14.Your ceiling.
15.Your eye.
16.Your computer.
17.Your favorite piece of jewelry.
18.Your favorite item of clothing.
19.Your favorite shoes.
20.Something important to you.
21.Something shiney.
22.Something red.
23.Something orange.
24.Something yellow.
25.Something green.
26.Something blue.
27.Something purple.
28.Something pink.
29.Something black.
30.Something rainbow.
31.Something that makes you smile.
32.Something that brings back a good memory.
33.Something that brings back a bad memory.
34.Something you've had since you were a child.
35.Something old.
36.Something new.
37.Something you think is cute.
38.Something funny.
39.Something cool.
40.Something weird that you own.
dinosaursarewicked:
bootycaller:
who wants to give up on society and go live in a treehouse with me
does it have wifi
its funny because people think im quiet
but im just listening to everyones conversations
and figuring out your weaknesses
and ill use them against you to get further in life
because i hate everyone
pavlovs-schrodinger:
pavlovs-schrodinger:
when im older and my kid needs me to sign something for school im just gonna write “Dad” in really crappy handwriting so it seems like my kid forged my signature and the teacher calls to tell me and im just “yes no it is i dad”
i posted this when i accidentally took too much medication
screw you guys
glamour-parade:
How do you politely tell someone that you want them naked on top of you
allonsyforever:
One time this boy in my math class ate an eraser
it was last week
i am seventeen years old
the class was A.P. calculus
bon-bon:
The older I get the more I realise there are no grown ups and nobody knows what the fuck they’re doing.
April 2013
“That’s when you know you’ve found somebody really special. When you can just...”
– Pulp Fiction (1994)
reblog if you`ve killed someone
thedoctorsin221b:
taco-l0ve:
phangirlingoverdisney:
queeenrachet:
biersackimagines:
enjoying-all-music:
let’s make this the post with the most notes ever.
yes.
Almost 13 million
13 million and counting.
what the hell did this even start as
parisjemm:
a relationship is like a house
if a lightbulb goes out, you don’t buy a new house, you just change the lightbulb.
unless that house is a lying whore
then you burn the fucker to the ground and buy a better house with lights that you can fucking count on.
every teacher: she has the ability but she's lazy
Macklemore
has song about feminism
has song about gay rights
has song about consumerism
has songs about drug abuse and alcoholism
has song about white privilege
in all of them, he speaks realistically about subject and includes his personal experience
fucking song about thrift shopping gets popular
convolutedscience:
assiest:
double standards disgust me. when a guy sleeps with a ton of women he’s a stud but when a girl sleeps with a ton of women she’s a lesbian
That was not the way I expected that sentence to end.
cumberbitch-freebitch:
otterparade:
cityofbadass:
Do you ever wonder about how an author would describe you in a novel? Not only your appearance but the way you talk and laugh and hold yourself and all the expressions on your face?
“And then there’s this asshole”
hikkomijian:
imagine guinea pigs
undomesticated
hunting
in packs
internetkilledmylife:
what if you made one of your popular text posts your status on facebook and someone accused you of stealing that text post from tumblr
Anonymous asked: Do me a lovely favour, darling?
novemberrain93:
boundedbyrealityy:
People send their kids to school, kids get shot.
People watch batman, they get shot.
People run marathons for charity, they get bombed.
Where is the innocence in the world, is there even good left in us?
Teacher sacrifices her life to save children. Hollywood cancels premiere and Christian Bale goes to honor victims. People rush to donate their own...
