i just ran onto my porch and screamed “CAN I JUST FUCKING BE GOOD ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY MAKE YOU FEEL SOMETHING” and a guy rode by on a bike and screamed “YOU ARE PERFECT AND YOU MAKE ME FEEL ALIVE”
wow fuck thank you stranger thank you very much
- christianity: god hates fags
- satanism: you'll be accepted no matter what
- christianity: you better worship us hardcore or you go to hell
- satanism: rituals are good, indeed, but not necessary, you're not forced.
- christianity: you better love everyone around you and god a lot
- satanism: it's stupid to think you can love everyone, love is an important feeling and you can't give it away to the ones who don't deserve it.
- christianity: respect others no matter what
- satanism: respect the ones who respect you
I would be an awful parent. My kid would say “I don’t wanna go to school I just wanna sleep” and I’d probably get in bed with them and say “I feel you”
I feel dead. I’m out of it. I’m low. And I want my addictions back. All of them. I want the world to just fuckoff & let me be. But I’m fighting .. 2 days & I’m at a painful reminder..and along with it, a day that I was supposed to kill myself. I hate nights. Hate them. I just want to sleep or tear myself to shreds. I want to break down & cry. That’s what I want right now. I want silence and to scream and bawl until I make myself sick. I’m so sick & tired..my fight for myself is trickling away it seems ..and I’m craving my blades more and more ..but I don’t tell anyone. If you look into my eyes it’s probably really clear. Even my scars are all visible now..literally EVERY scar on my wrist is white or purple .. Iwantitsobad. I sit some nights & debate it. Before getting ashamed & breaking down because I feel weak.
..shit. I’m venting on tumblr again. Been a while. I’m gunna just end this post before I burst into tears. Fuck nights.
Anonymous asked: is there anyone that you miss?
Yeah, I miss a lot of people….but I guess I can’t sit and miss them all the time, because they’re no longer in my life anymore. Even if it hurts so badly to have them forget everything I remember.